DILEMMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :S
hmm.. how should i put tis...
two weeks break.
a period of time b4 my life turn into a living hell.
a period of time to mesmerize all da memories wif all of u~
a period of time to watch all da dramas.
a period of time to think things over.
a period of time to figure out the solution for should-i-do-it-or-not matter..
recently, i've been doin much thinking abt guys.
nt guys as in a whole bt those tat i like.
as once said, "u can like hundreds of guys bt u only love one". tats true.
two days ago i went out wif a guy fren.
aaaahh~~ such a long time since i go dating wif jz guy. haha!
n so, tis triggered me to reconcile all my do-i-reali-like-him problems.
Guy #1
-we used to talk alot n share lotsa tings, bt at tat moment, he already seeing someone.
no matter how hapi i am, i noe whr i stand. im jz a bystander. i should nt interfere. so i jz keep da feeling to myself. im nt even sure whether tat feelin is tat i reali like him or its jz tat im feelin lonely.
-months past since we last went out.... the feeling for him gradually decrease.. i guess i dont reali fall for him. i jz enjoy his company.
-somehow, in one way or another, i'll miss all da conversation we had. in total, i miss him.
-i even tot of confessing bt i hold back. i've gt rejected once n i dun hope history to repeat itself. n so i wait.. da more i wait, da more the feeling fades.
-so now, finali, im able to shoooo him out of my mind. but (argh always a but in everyting!!) once a while, i still check out on him (im nt a stalker). aish...wats wrong wif me??! =.=
Guy#2
-he jz way too gud. i mean his personality. altho im nt reali close to him, i can c tat everyone around him likes him. everybody seems to enjoy having him around.
-we used to text alot. almost everytime, im da one who find him 1st. tis makes me think, "im da only one feelin like tis, am i?". as time pass, i made a conclusion. i do not like him. he's jz being nice n friendly (:
Guy #3
-i've known him since..... aaahh~ i cant rmbr. probably around 2 yrs? =/
i've never met him. we're net frens til da day we decided to hang out. well, everyting turns out great except i almost fall asleep in cinema o.o U cant reali blame me. i watched the same show twice.
-it has been months since i last went out one-on-one wif a guy fren. its nt tat im desperate or wat... it gives u somekind of feelin tat u'll never gt for dating a gurl. ah, im crapping :S
-ppl say when u're wif a guy, if ur heartbeat beats fast, u definitely like him. as for me, i dun feel so. thus i dont like him? bt i miss the outing vry much wor... how's tat? =/
-mayb, like i said, its been a long time since i went out wif guy. so i feel lidat. so i dont like him after all? i cant even answer tis question which has been playin in my mind all da time. aaahh~ stupid me.
-when our eyes met, it seems like the time stops. everytin around me is motion-less. i wish tat moment can stay as long as i want.. bt everytime tat hpn, i always look away. haha.. ==
-so peeps, does tat mean i like him? somehow, i feel tat im nt reali his type. haiz... im still confused. everytin is so complicated!!!!
im walking on a path alone...
its dark..
whr is the end point?? it feels like i've been walking for ages.
i still cant c any light..
will i succeed?
i miss sunshine...
where are you~~~
